TAX SEASON part 1

Cheesy picture. But this is what my desk looks like.

We are in the deep, dark depths of tax season at the CPA firm where I work. 5 more weeks. 5 more weeks until the work comes to an abrupt halt (April 15th), and we get to drink beer and martini's in the break room. I frequently repeat this to myself and my co-workers as we drown our stress with coffee and Nestle chocolate easter eggs (or maybe that's just me).

Stress levels are running HIGH. The tax season "walk" is in full effect--accountants speed walk around the office, crashing into each other as they round a corner, then glaring at one another for costing an extra second away from their desk. Tax returns, financial statements, and packages are not placed, but tossed on my desk, or worse, pushed in my face. I can forgive the accountants though, I understand that this is their "time of year." But clients get no excuses.



We pre-address envelopes and label any place that the client needs to sign and date(with yellow stickers that say "sign and date here"). But, really, you're 30 years old, and you don't know when you need to send your taxes in by? And apparently there's a rumor going around that postage is guaranteed if a package is going to the IRS...!? Umm...nope, your envelope gets returned to US, and we stamp it and re-send it out. Other clients don't understand why they can't show up any time during the day and meet with a partner. Or why their taxes won't be done by the end of the week. (Yes, I understand you need to know how much of a refund you're getting so that you can go shopping, but you aren't the ONLY client.) But the clients who are rude are by far the worst.


I try to answer the phone as pleasantly as possible. I really do. Even when I am elbow deep in 30 copies of financial statements while helping a client at the front desk (who is probably asking me questions about their taxes that I know absolutely NOTHING about). Anyways, a client who calls frequently says ONLY the name of the person that he needs to speak with when I answer. He actually turns the name into a command. Impressive, I suppose. But the admin. staff has spent so much time imitating him that I can't even find him rude anymore, I just stiffle my giggles when he calls. Well, yesterday he got topped. A woman called multiple times (probably 8 times throughout the day), and, before I could even finish my schpeale, abruptly said "I need...(fill-in-the-blank with said person's name)." Shocked by the interuption, I sent her through to the person. "Well, I need you to be polite, so let's try that again," is what I wanted to tell her. But, restraining myself, I dragged my conversation out with her as long as possible with each proceeding call. I asked who was calling every single time, then I told her that "said-person" was in a meeting or away from her desk. Really, not very exciting, but deep down I felt a little bit better by forcing her to talk to little ol' me for a just a little bit longer. Always alllways make friends with the receptionists. We remember things.


Finally, I completely understand calling back a number on your cell phone that you don't recognize. I do it sometimes, but usually I just search the number on google (much less painful). Recently more and more people have called the office because they "received a phone call from this number." Um...ok. So, I repeat the name of my office. The caller almost always asks if we are a law firm, so I explain to them that we are a CPA firm ("what's that?" one caller asked, no lie). Then I ask the caller if they have checked their voicemail. Duh, I know, but sometimes they are too "busy" to check their voicemail first. About 90% of the time the caller asks, "...do you know who might have called me?" At this point, three other phone lines are usually ringing,and I am completely over this game. I explain, as calmly as possible, that no, I do not know who called you because we have over 75 employees. For some reason the caller seems to have trouble grasping this...and mumbles something or pauses for just a second too long. "But someone called me from this number, and I am important," I know they are thinking. As quickly as possible, I apologize and hang up before the conversation can continue.

**I have been advised that the next time this happens, I should start naming every single employee "who might have called them." Yup, all 75 of them. Or I will tell them that, yes, I did call you, and where the heck is my pepperoni pizza?!